I would like to start by thanking the readers who left comments regarding the previous post about my father. A lot of people also sent messages telling me their own tragic and sad stories of of grief and loss. I am deeply honored by your openness and I hope that someday, you'll also find the courage to write and talk about it. The blog entry apparently touched a chord in people's hearts especially those who have suffered a loss of a loved one. Death is a universal experience we will all have. Even those who have not lost a parent yet, there is bound to be fear of that happening sooner or later. I suppose my one goal was to remind everyone that we need to grab every opportunity we have to let everyone who matters to us know how significant they are in our lives. It is so easy to forget and fall into a pattern of procrastination. We fool ourselves into thinking that they're always going to be around and that we have all the time in the world. As you already know, I learned that bitter lesson too late. Thomas Carlyle said it better: "The tragedy of life is not so much what men suffer, but rather what they miss".  

On a much lighter note, the Christmas holidays are upon us again as evidenced by the shopping frenzy  and the flurry of parties to attend. Of course, most people already have their Christmas tree up and their decorations out, enhancing the ambiance of the season's favorite holiday. Sadly, our abode will be an exception this year. Since our house is still on the market, we decided it would be better to keep things simple and uncluttered for the viewing of potential buyers. Also, there's no telling what our puppies would do around a prickly tree. I don't fancy rescuing my pups under a 6 ft Douglas fir. Plus, they would most likely tear into those boxes of presents like we never feed them ever.

Just because this year's holiday celebration will not be traditional in terms of the trappings that come with it, it will not be bereft of the holiday spirit at all. Instead of an ornament-laden tree, I have my memories to cherish and share . I browsed through my old photo albums and searched for the images that reflected the "ghosts of the Christmas past" . As I've mentioned before, it's been 12 years since I last spent Christmas with my own kinsfolk but throughout the years, my friends and I have forged a relationship that is akin to family. We have each other to help us survive the homesickness and pangs of loneliness during the holidays. The moments I shared with them were the most precious ornaments I could ever collect and treasure. For those of you who are transplants yourselves, I hope that you found your own "ornaments" too. Let me share to you my little Christmas tree...

This photo was taken during the early years of working at the nursing home . Our professional relationship evolved into friendship a nd we became each other's surrogate family. We had a common denominator, our being Filipinos, and that was enough to start with. We were mainly just a small group of single young women  enjoying the freedom and independence of living on our own in a different country and culture. We were missing our own family but we happily settled for each other's company.

This seemingly blissful image belied the calamitous events that followed weeks later . It was probably at this time that I finally entered the world of adults and became aware of the responsibilities and repercussions of being one. This photo reminded me of innocence lost and dreams shattered . It was one of those growing up pains that could either break you or make you stronger. A fleeting reminder of how darkness can sometimes come to our lives and it seemed like it can only get worse. Alas! Despite the turmoil, people learned their lessons and moved on.  All the better for the experience and insight they've gained throughout the experience.

This was a more formal Christmas party at a small banquet place. The attendees were still mostly women but a few men  had crept up in the mix. I remember I had a bad case of PMS that night. Couple that with homesickness and it made for a bad recipe for a party spoiler. Everybody had a great time anyway. This was probably the only time that we had a nice group photo taken. I realize I have not seen some of these people in the past few years. As they say, change is the only permanent thing in this world. People, just like relationships, came and went over the years. Some firmly left their imprints on our lives and some simply faded into oblivion.   

Mariah and I had been room mates for a couple of years before we finally decided to decorate for Christmas in 1999. We bought a fresh Christmas tree and somehow managed to drag it up the elevators to our apartment on the 6th floor . We had fun decorating it with a few inexpensive ornaments including the two angels that we used as tree toppers. I was able to keep them when our living arrangement ended a year or so later. We also hosted our first party with a theme: white christmas. Our friends were asked to wear something white and most of them did. We had karaoke and oodles of fun.Although life gets complicated at times, when it comes to having fun, we didn't require much. All we needed were some good food and a stimulating company.

This was the first time Kenny encountered my friends. We just met on Christmas Day in 1999 and celebrated the New Year's eve at a party downtown. I was giddy and thrilled  to have met such a great fella so I invited him to Kismet's birthday fete (Jan 1st) so he can get acquainted with my pals. It was truly bold of him to accept the invitation not knowing what to envisage from a typical Filipino gathering. It turned out to be the first of many more Filipino parties he went to for the years that followed. My friends warmed up to him pretty quickly, I might add.  It marked another major turning point in my life. I entered the new millenium with high hopes and optimism that I finally found Mr. Right.

This was the second Christmas Kenny and I spent together but probably also the last time we celebrated it with a few friends who relocated months later.   Just one of the many changes and moves that happen as life goes on. The new year brought new marriages, births, jobs, friendships, break-ups, hook-ups, deaths... A lot of things happened that year, just like a spinning wheel.

As you can see, there were a lot more men in attendance in this Christmas party in 2003. It was held at my friend Mating's place. We had a few more additions to our ever expanding family.  It was notably the first time that Tom (Mariah's boyfriend and Kenny's friend) was formally introduced to the group. It must have been a total shock to him to see so many camera flash bulbs going off from different directions at any time. Like Kenny, he had to overcome the initial discomfort and uncertainty and be plucky enough to find his spot in the impromptu photo ops and not get caught in the stampede . I'm happy to report that he survived the induction and has since become a regular fixture in our shindigs as well.

This photo was taken in 2004, an evidence of how far we've come in our journey through life. In contrast to the first picture above, this was a far cry from what our lives were like eons ago. Although a few of our friends are still single, this image just goes to show that there is someone out there for everyone. If not, there's always our friendship. 

This was taken last year. Sadly, a few people didn't make it to the party due to some conflicting schedules but it didn't keep us from getting together. Our Christmas party has become the one tradition that we didn't want to miss. We also had another addition to the fold. Mae's sister, Jennifer, celebrated her first Christmas in the US, away from her family and from everything familiar. If she felt homesick at all, I didn't think she had a chance to wallow in it. Despite the low number of attendees, we still managed to be merry and enjoyed each other's company.  It was also at this party that the seeds of an adventure were planted. By midnight, eight of us made a commitment to travel together to Europe. Four months later, we spent two weeks travelling in Paris and Italy and we remained friends in the aftermath.

This year, the party was held last Saturday at Mae's new house. In contrast to last year, the party was a huge hit. We picked red as the party theme and we even have our own Santa Claus.   Our friend Chuck played the role to the hilt, more to the delight of the adults than the kids. I guess we made up for not having a real looking Santa Claus when growing up in the Philippines. It was quite hilarious beyond words.Also, it was our puppies' first Christmas party. They had so much fun chasing the kids around the house. It was a wonderful celebration indeed.

 I suppose this is one of my favorite snapshot of me and Mariah. No longer room mates but we still share the same chums and celebrate the holidays together. We might have only been friends for a few years but we've seen each other through all the vicissitudes . We both have matured and have a better appreciation of the important things in our life.

 I couldn't make up my mind what years these photographs were taken but they're a few of my favorites of me and Kenny. It just make my heart melts whenever I think about how much of a metamorphosis he has brought and the impression he has made in my life . These holidays are even more momentous now that I'm sharing them with him. What greater Christmas gift is there than that?