A life without love in it is like a heap of cold ashes in a hearth, the fire dead, all warmth and laughter gone, and no more light.

"This is my archive of personal experiences, articles, quotes and bits that I fine fascinating, humorous, enlightening, disturbing, inspirational, challenging, and perhaps, worth sharing. I hope others will find them interesting and useful as well. Reactions are appreciated, not feared."


Gosh! I didn't know that.... Thanks
Pretty Please...



It's been a few days since a had a little meltdown
while typing my previous entry. I didn't even realize that it was already getting to be a long one until I had to stop. Anyway, I still feel compelled to continue writing about my father. If I won't, who else will? He was not some Nobel Prize winner
or somebody of prestige
and social importance
whose memoirs people will be writing and reading about. In fact, he was quite the opposite. So, friends and fellow bloggers, I hope you will indulge me.
My father was a quiet, non-confrontational and unassuming person. He was good at his profession (was the Assistant City Agriculturist in our city)
and earned the respect of his collegues and the people he served. As much as he had some political inclinations (it runs in the family, I think), he decided to stay in the background for the sake of job security and ensuring that his family was adequately provided for. My parents never took vacations or spent money on themselves. Whatever they had, they tried to invest in business schemes to augment their income.
Sad to say, the country's ever fluctuating economy and corrupt government didn't provide a thriving environment to those who want to prosper. Nevertheless, they had enough to send us to good schools and to college.
When I graduated
in 1991, my parents were there at my side. I could still remember how proud they were.
More so when I passed the Licensure Exam and the CGFNS
. I knew that with every achievement I attained, they felt validated and gratified
that all their sacrifices were not for naught. Then, an awesome thing happened in 1992
. My mother got pregnant!!!
My siblings and I were definitely floored but we welcomed the news with enthusiasm
and wonderment. My father was definitely beaming with pride
. He was every bit the caring and doting expectant father.
When my youngest sister Melisande was born, I saw a different side of him I never thought he had. He was very hands-on and little Sande had him wrapped around her little pinky. Even Mama said that Papa was a better father and husband this time around.
He also became more active in church and religious affiliations. He seemed like he had a second wind at life. It was indeed wonderful to see.
Over the last 11 years, I lived an independent life in another country. Whenever I hit some bumps along the way, my father never failed to let me know that I could always come home
. When I finally met the man of my life
, I saw some qualities in him that my father had. When it was time for him to meet my family, Kenny made a point to speak to Papa of his intentions. Being the conscientious father that Papa was, he made sure Kenny made an honest woman out of me. 
When Kenny and I got engaged
, we made plans for my parents to come to the US for the wedding. The first time they applied for the visas, they were turned down
. We were down-hearted and stressed out
. I was especially devastated since I dreamed of my father walking me down the isle. I swore that if my father will not be there, I will walk to the altar by myself. Kenny pushed for another try at the visas. Albeit reluctantly, my parents did and both miraculously passed the interview
. My mother confided later that if they were made to choose if only one person will be granted a visa, she said she wanted my father to get it.
She knew it meant so much to me to have my father there.
Here comes the waterworks again
. To be continued...
I am also a Bull.
Awww, honey it makes me so sad to see you in such pain. Just try to take one day at a time and BREATHE DEEP ;) Thanks for stopping by to see my mess of a journal. My whole website is messed up. I switched to PRO and now I can't even get into my FTP account to do anything. I sent a ticket to bravenet and the guy sent it to some head honcho with a "We are deeply sorry for any problems you are going through bla bla bla" sent to me. I hope it's fixed soon. Until then I will try to keep my spirits up....atleast I can still blog :) Take Care You
Good luck on your Mom and sister's visa application.